Wait... a minute...
Did you buy a mans butt on purpose, someone found out and now you need a justification?
"Yeah they send the wrong one. Of course I wanted a female one. But look at all those random internet people... they would have used it too!"
You're right on the money. When I was fucking it, my dad walked in and we both froze. It was a very intense moment. We locked eyes for 7 seconds, his face in shock, mine in fear. He said, "I knew my son was gay", and put his head down and shut the door. I knew he be upset after he saw this, so I started screaming really loud that THIS BUSSY FEELS SO GOOD! I wanted the entire neighborhood to hear. I made the whole house shake; you could hear all the cups and plates breaking on the kitchen floor as they fell out the cabinets. I was opening chakra gates I never knew the body possessed. My dad came back a second time, but this time I didn't stop, I kept going. I maintained eye contact to assert dominance. He told me to stop, but it only made me pump harder and faster. If I told you what I happened next, you wouldn't believe me.